This week’s focus is compassion and how it supports us through the holiday season, especially in recovery. The holidays often amplify emotions, memories, and relationships. Compassion becomes a stabilizing force that helps us stay present, grounded, and connected rather than pulled into guilt, regret, or old patterns.

The holidays used to feel overwhelming for me. I carried old guilt, old patterns, and old expectations into every room I walked into. But over time I’ve learned that mindfulness isn’t just about breathing exercises or slowing down. For me, mindfulness begins with forgiveness. If I’m holding resentments toward myself or others, I’m not in the moment. And if I’m not in the moment, I’m giving away my power.

Transformation isn’t a single moment. It’s not the instant you decide to change. It’s the process that unfolds after that decision. Real transformation is born in the small, quiet choices we make each day, especially when no one is watching.

Before I discovered transformational therapy, I thought I had a clear sense of who I was. The truth is, I was only showing the world a version of me that wore different masks. Those masks fit the roles I played: partner, father, mentor, teacher. They didn’t always reflect the real me underneath.

Acceptance doesn’t mean agreeing with everything or allowing people to cross your boundaries. It means releasing the need for judgment or control and choosing peace over resistance. It’s letting go of the weight you were never meant to carry. Self-worth is the fuel for both acceptance and the way we handle judgment. When we value ourselves, we trust our own path and stop needing to control someone else’s. Without that foundation, disagreement can make us closed-minded, and that’s when control issues tend to rise up, pushing us to try and “fix” people instead of allowing them to create their own experience, just as we create ours.

Here’s the truth about recovery, and about life. You can want it and dream about it all you want, but without real effort, nothing changes. Knowledge alone isn’t enough. It takes wisdom in action. Commitment is that action.

To truly transform and be free, we must forgive, especially ourselves. This is vital for anyone dealing with substance use or mental health struggles. When we hold on to anger or hurt, we create resentment. And resentment is poison. It eats away at us psychologically and physically.